Friday, September 4, 2009

I didn't see that coming . . .

Remember how I stole my Mom's car? That was a month ago. I still had it up until last night at about 10:00. That's when my mother knocked on my front door, totally unannounced. She had her loyal houseman Juan with her. They were here for the car.

She was dressed to the nines, very chipper and acting as though nothing is wrong between us. At some point she threatened to spank me. I don't know what that's about.

They drank a glass of water and headed out, bound for Jackson, MS which is about 4.5 hours away. Dawn and I got in bed. About 20 minutes later, another knock on the door. She was back. She had lost Juan who was driving the rental car that still had her purse and cell phone in it. She couldn't remember his cell phone number. Dawn had to go handle that one. I was close to combustion.

Dawn called her this morning. She said they made it back at about 4 a.m. No idea what took them so long.

What the Fuck!?



  1. Have you ever read any of Ellen Gilchrist's books? Your mother reminds me of one of her characters which I believe are all sort of like Ellen herself.

  2. Ms. Moon - Not her novels, but her shorts for sure. The one that pops to mind is the one where the mother lets the nanny drown in the storm. So yeah, that sounds about right.