Saturday, July 25, 2009

Since I'm Struggling for Inspiration

I'll just tell you funny things that my kids say and do.

We have a book called Quiet Loud by Leslie Patricelli. It is a simple board book with one sentence on each page. "Birds are Quiet. Airplanes are Loud." (Clearly the author has not met my Tranny Cockatiels Opie and Lou.) Faith was reading/has the book memorized and was reciting the book in a whisper in the car yesterday. She turned the page and paused. I looked over to see which word had stumped her. "Sniffles." I waited while she thought about it. Finally she said, "Boogers are Quiet. Sneezes are Loud."

Faith walked through the kitchen carrying the fish food. I asked her what she was going to do. (I understand that it should have been clear to me what she was going to do. Right? With my kids it's better to ask. The odds that she said, "I'm going to feed the fish" were as good as the odds that she said something like, "I'm making a collage. I need little yellow flakes to represent the sand.") On this day, though she said, "I'm going to feed the betas." One of the betas is William's fish William. So when William heard her say that, he jumped up, put his hands on his hips, arched his back and buried his blue eyes in a furrowed brow that would make Churchill proud and said, "Nonsense! Only I can feed William!"

Last night, when William asked for dessert I handed him what was left of an Organic White Chocolate bar (YUM!) He took a bite, handed it back to me and said, "I not like it. Let's sell it on eBay."

Storm. Storm. As I noted in an earlier post, Storm is my most loving and most ridiculously difficult child. He has spent most of this week in his room because he refuses to write 20 words a day in cursive. Refuses. Flat out will not do it. He has missed a lunch outing, a trip to Fort Pickens for bike riding, and an episode of The Penguins of Madagascar. Trust me, that's a heartbreaker. This morning he was up to 100 words because he hasn't done it for 5 days. He and Dawn renegotiated. 20 words, 20 math facts, 20 pages of reading from a book of her choice, 20 spelling words to be found in a word search, and 20 something else. She numbered the paper 1 - 20 for the cursive writing. Storm sat down and not 5 minutes later brought me the work. Totally done. In 5 minutes. The words he chose, you ask? That little shit wrote One, Two, Three, Four, Five etc.

Baby Ray came running down the hallway in a total panic. Totally naked. With a massive erection that he was pointing to. He said, "Uh Oh! Uh Oh! Uh Oh!"

Thanks for everyone's sweet words over the past few days. I love you guys.


  1. i need to meet your kids.
    they sound amazing.
    do they need a nanny...?!

  2. Les! Yes! They need as many people who love them as possible! They especially need people who acknowledge their entire family. Yes! Please come here!

  3. Awesome. Dontcha just luv em? And the picts are so telling. Most of the time I think my kids are all the inspiration I need.

  4. Let's live closer, ok? Like right around the block.

    I miss the kids and you gals.

  5. OK! Another vote for Refocksa Ranch! Where should we put this monstrosity anyway?

  6. I say we all move to some place where the heat isn't extreme and the cold isn't too cold and the cost of living isn't thru the roof...LMAO

  7. I loved the cursive "One, two, three, four...", I wish I was that smart! BTW-my daughter chose Fort Walton Beach as our vacation destination at Christmastime. If we can still swing it by then, I'd love to meet you all!

  8. Dena, Yes! Of course! We have a Christmas obsession. We're obnoxious Christmas people, but if you can stand it, yes, yes! We would love that!

  9. These are hilarious. They are so ingenious!

  10. You're children are so beautiful. I have no words.